Forced Mistakes

When you look out the window, do you feel a sense of guilt? Have you done something wrong outside those four walls you spend most of your life in? Does you conscience vibrate when you remember back?

There are various kinds of mistakes we as human beings can commit. There are those we plan, there are those we accidentally cause because of carelessness. But there is one kind of mistake that is quite hard to deal with. The forced mistakes.

Confrontations are an essential part of our lives. Sometimes we fight over a subject for so long that after a while we get annoyed in such a manner, we start saying stuff we usual would never say.

It’s not because we mean what we say, but because we are fed up, angered, annoyed, disturbed by all the continuing fighting.

When we reach the phase were logic arguments don’t have any value anymore and it’s only about “I’m right because I say so” things tend to get ugly pretty quick. Because what else is the abandonment of logic and proper argumentation but a prelude to “I want to punch you in your face so hard!”?

With strangers I guess this kind of struggle you could bear with, because you have the option not to talk and avoid that person. You can cut all ties and not speak to him/her anymore and the problem doesn’t exist anymore.

But if you are having this kind of involvement with someone from the family… oh boy. You can’t avoid them, you have to speak to them and no matter what you say, you’re wrong. You can’t punch them, because, well, they’re family.

This is what is called an impasse. A dead-end in which you’re pushed into a corner, not allowed to defend yourself without causing a major drama.

And exactly there, when we are pushed into that corner we start to say pretty rude things. Stuff we never mean truthfully, but just for the sake not to suffocate, we throw a punishing punch with words, hoping to escape the deadlock.

You might get to breathe, but the interpretation of what you just said is now totally at the mercy of your “opponent”. They might make a huge deal out of it or realize that this is just a reflex answer of being pushed into the corner.

These forced mistakes, well, they are the worst kind of mistakes. Because you know you didn’t mean it and you only said it due to the afore mentioned reasons. Your opponent makes a huge deal out of it, tries to disassemble you. And when this person is your mother or father, you know you have to apologize sooner or alter. But you don’t want to because you know it’s not your fault. But your mom or your dad won’t talk to you if you don’t show at least the tiniest sign of regret.

What follows is literally a cold war. No one talks, but you try to hurt your opponent whenever you get the chance. High electric fees? It must be your fault! Ridiculously high taxes? Only because of you!

Sometimes its better to avoid certain topics with family members. One of these being politics. Trust me, you’ll be forced to make a mistake in discussions about politics.